It’s game day for the absent-minded dictator.

It’s been announced that “President” Biden will be making his first official call to Justin Trudeau, Prime Minister of Canada, today.

This is how I picture the call going:

Justin: Hello?

Joe: Hey, man! It’s Joe! I’m back! Haha.

Justin: Haha, it’s an honor to speak to you Mr. President, and congratulations again on your historic victory.

Joe: Well, thanks man, it’s just uh, things are alright man. It’s alright. So how’s things there?

Justin: Well, we’ve got the COVID issue, of course, but we’re excited about new beginnings in America.

Joe: Haha, well, yeah. I just, uh… I just had my lunch.

Justin: …

Joe: We had uh, well, we uh, we just ordered out again, because you know, you can’t sit in the place cuz’a this damn thing.

Justin: Yeah, um. Yeah, me and my secretary just ordered in from this Pashtun place that has really been doing well with the takeout, hot plates, bringing in their own cutlery and such.

Joe: Your secretary! Haha, be careful now, young man!

Justin: Hahaha

Joe: …

Justin: Heh, yeah…

Joe: I shouldnta, man I shouldnta said that, that’s… I just, uh…

Justin: No, no! It’s perfectly fine, Mr. President. Your irreverence is well known and well loved here in Canada.

Joe: I’m sorry, I uh…

Justin: It’s perfectly fine, Mr. President.

Joe: Well, we’re uh… they’re tellin’ me we gotta go, so I guess, I uh… we’ll be talkin…

Justin: We’ll be talking soon, Mr. President. Thank you for the call, it’s always an honor, and congratulations again.

Joe: Alright, man. You take care. And don’t let your wife catch you with that secretary!

Justin: She’s a good girl, haha.

Joe: Well, you kids know how it goes, I’m an old guy, so I uh, we…

Justin: Young at heart, Mr. President.

Joe: Okay, we’ll, we’ll be talkin’, looks like the vaccine is goin’ in and uh… we’re gettin’ the job done.

Justin: …

Joe: But they’re saying I gotta go! We’ll see yah…

Justin: Bye now.